Think Fast
by Vietta
Summary: Reno makes Rufus play catch with him so he can make perverse jokes.


Rufus looked at the hand shaped monstrosity Reno flopped onto his desk with a raised eyebrow, pausing in his paperwork so that he could examine the cracked and worn leather that was shedding small flecks of decorative aged-bovine-flesh onto paperwork his father had sent to him to finish. "Reno, what is this?"  
>The red-head flopped himself languidly into the chair across from Rufus' desk and rolled his eyes. "It's a baseball glove, brat. It's for playing baseball."<p>

"Why is it on my desk?" The young blonde dusted away the leather fragments that peppered his otherwise tidy workspace.

"Because you're the only one I can trust to play catch with me. Everyone else will toss it at my family jewels, but I know you'll stay away from the pearls and go for the face, if you can throw far enough or hard enough to threaten any part of me at all." Reno held up his own brown leather glove, which held a small white ball in its giant grasp. He didn't want to admit to Rufus that he only asked him to play baseball because Dark Nation was at the vet getting her vaccinations updated; they both knew that if Dark Nation were curled up at Rufus' feet like she normally was, Reno wouldn't be anywhere near the blonde.

Rufus frowned and edged the glove off his desk with his pen. "I don't want to play catch with you."

Reno pouted, feeling slightly insulted. "Why not?"

"I just don't want to." Rufus held the glove out to Reno on the end of his pen, not wanting to touch it lest the aged leather flake onto his hands.

"It's not like you've got anything important to do, Rufus. You're only vice-president of the company. Besides, you haven't taken any time off in the past seven months. You've gotta take a break sometime, bratface, you're only human, right?" Reno shoved the glove into Rufus' lap, smirking at the way the leather flaked onto his crisp white pants.

"Indeed, I am human, but let me rephrase what I wanted to say, Reno. I don't think you quiet understood what it was I meant." Rufus cleared his throat and picked the glove up off of his suit pants, brushing the aged flakes aside. "I don't want to play with you, nor do I have the time or energy to do so."

Reno rolled his eyes and stood. "Baloney! Play catch with me for ten minutes at least. You're scheduled to take a break today anyways."

"If I do it, will you leave me alone?" Rufus looked at Reno seriously, hoping the answer would be yes. He could deal with ten minutes of a stupid game if it meant Reno would leave him alone for the rest of the day.

Reno nodded. "Hell yeah, I'll leave you alone if you play catch with me for awhile."

Rufus stood and grabbed the glove Reno had polluted his desk with, "Then I'll play catch with you."

"Let's go!" Reno grabbed Rufus' wrist and dragged him outside, not giving him a chance to shake him off. He wanted to play catch and, hell or high water, he was going to play catch.

Rufus let Reno drag him out of his office with a deep frown, just wanting the whole ordeal to be done with. He really couldn't stand sports; any activity involved so much pointless pain and sweating over a trophy that could be acquired through much easier means, like a cash transaction with a trophy maker, was a waste of time and energy. However, Rufus would do anything for a little quiet time.

Reno dragged Rufus outside and slipped his glove onto his hand, tossing the baseball into it with a rogue grin. He stood a ways away from Rufus and tossed the ball at the blonde, blinking as the blonde clumsily attempted to capture the pale projectile in his flaky glove. The ball passed Rufus' outstretched glove and smashed into his chest, forcing the blonde to take a few steps back to compensate the force of the blow against his weak frame. "Ow!"

Reno rolled his eyes at Rufus as the blonde picked up the ball and, angrily, tossed it back to him. Reno scooped the ball up as it bounced towards him, the force Rufus had used had not been enough to rocket the ball the way the angry blonde had wanted to. "Rufus, you can't seriously suck this bad at playing catch. It has got to be the easiest thing in the world to do."

"Well not everyone has good hand-eye coordination!" Rufus frowned and held his glove above his brow, squinting through the light of the sun at the red-head only a few feet away from him. "This sunlight doesn't help either!"

Reno looked up at the sky, eyebrows raised as he easily tossed the ball from hand to glove. "Rufus, it's cloudy out today." He looked back at the blonde. "You've got to get outside more. You're fucking your eyes up being inside all the time."

"I'm not inside all the time! I just…do a majority of my daily activities inside." Rufus frowned and held his glove out for the ball, determined not to give Reno more opportunity to insult him.

"Yeah, whatever. Either way, with all the _inside activities_ you and Tseng do together, you should be the best _catcher _in the world." Reno grinned as he tossed the ball back to Rufus, chuckling at his own perverse nature.

Rufus made a valiant attempt to catch the ball, frowning deeper as it bounced off his glove and hit his chest again. "What are you talking about? How does what Tseng and I do in out free time make me a great catcher?"

"Obviously you need to take a few more of Tseng's night classes to be a good catcher. He must not be a good teacher if you can't even catch this tiny little ball right." Reno laughed and waited for Rufus to toss the ball back.

"A smaller ball is harder to catch!" Rufus frowned and tossed the ball back as hard as his flimsy arms could manage to throw it, finally understanding the perverse undertone to Reno's voice for what it was and regretting what he had said. "Shut the hell up, Reno."

Reno caught the ball, laughing hard. "So, are you saying that Tseng teaches you to catch with a big ball?"

"I said shut up!" Rufus frowned as his hand began sweating inside the suffocating leather glove he had it stuffed inside.

"Why? I've still got five minutes left to see just how well you can catch." Reno grinned and tossed the ball back.

Rufus growled as the ball bounced out of his glove yet again, tossing his glove onto the ground. "This game sucks!"

"Why? Because you can't catch? Does that mean you're the one throwing all the balls around when you and Tseng are together?" Reno laughed at Rufus' back as the blonde stomped away from him.

"Shut up, Reno!" Rufus stomped back into the Shinra building, smoke rolling out his ears as his fiery temper burned through his sense of reason.

"I've got five minutes! You promised! Five minutes or I spend the rest of the day questioning your homosexual abilities!" Reno grinned and watched Rufus stop his angry stomp parade, hearing the grass-less lawn of the Shinra company sigh in relief.

Rufus turned on his heel and stalked back to his glove, scooping it off the ground along with the small, leather clothed ball beside it. "Five minutes, and then I'm going to start shooting. We'll see what jokes you make about my sexual orientation when you're spitting bullets out your teeth."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: I'm sorry this is so short, but I can't make it any longer without ruining it. Personally, I laughed while writing it. I'm a sucker for perverted jokes! I can't help but giggle obnoxiously at them.<strong>


End file.
